McSweeney’s Internet Tendency: I Cannot In Good Conscience Vote For Any Candidate Who Shares My Beliefs.
I’ve done a lot of soul searching in the past few weeks. Like many Americans, the upcoming election has forced me to deeply examine my own opinions about the future of our country. That is why, after careful consideration, I have decided that I cannot in good conscience vote for any candidate who shares my beliefs.
In turbulent times such as these, it’s more important than ever to elect politicians who can make the right decisions for the future of this country. I have come to believe that any candidate who agrees with someone like me on a majority of the important issues facing our country is unqualified to do so.
Foreign policy, the economy, climate change—any politician who is as uninformed and misguided as I am about these issues has no business occupying our nation’s highest office. Our country deserves better than someone who shares my garbage beliefs.
Even if a politician disagrees with me on 90% of the issues, it may not be enough. Even one of my dangerous, shortsighted, truly awful ideas could be catastrophic if enacted as policy on a national level. The stakes are simply too high for anyone in a position of power to agree with me.
I’m willing to hold out hope that at some point in the next few months, a candidate will emerge who has the vision and wisdom necessary to ignore everything I say we should do. But if we can somehow find someone who fundamentally disagrees with me about the state of our country and what should be done about it, then, and only then, can I feel confident that we have found someone capable of running our country.